Wednesday, 7 February 2018

Many Fish in the Sea!

When you're dealing with a fresh heartbreak and trying to come to terms with the fact that the man you want doesn't really want you back- the most common yet the most consoling line you hear from friends and acquaintances alike is - "There are many fish in the sea"

So you start to think that maybe you picked the fish that was wrong for you; and maybe the right fish is still in the sea looking for you. And the truth is, people will tell you that there are many many fish in the sea- waiting to be caught by you- and they're right! But what no one tells you about is the bitter truth- the sea is full of fish that are already married!

On my recent trip to Thailand (and you'll be hearing more on that!)- I met a wonderful man- charming, good-looking, and of course possessing other wonderful qualities that I would've noticed had I been sober. We got to talking and as it turned out, he was from India too, and we had some similar interests. We started to play a game at the club we were at, where he decided to prove to me that I was the only girl around who was not ready to get handsy with him or any other man in sight- turns out he was right.

I was totally floored with the ease with which he approached women and ended up with his tongue down their throats within seconds. Did I want to be one of those women? No. But the confidence was a plus!

Honestly at this point in my life, for the first time- I don't know what I want, and while that's okay, it does puzzle me beyond measure. Do I want to be more patient with Mr. Right while he chooses to conveniently ignore my existence? Do I want to proactively pursue one of the 14592 men who are after me? Do I want to indulge in something casual and let my feelings take a backseat? Or do I just want to take a break from men altogether? I don't know.

So when this guy at the club asked for my number, I gave it to him without putting much thought. He kissed me on the cheek, and whispered in my ear that he'll see me tomorrow and he'll text me and coordinate. I called it a night and left the club, but it was 5am already!

I behaved like a typical teenager the next day, and checked my phone roughly around 749590 times to see if he had texted me- but he hadn't. I got dressed and decided to go to the Full Moon Party where we were supposed to 'coordinate and catch up'. I did hope of running into him and I did- right at the entrance- I locked eyes with him while his lips were locked with a Russian. I smiled at him, and at my own foolishness, and I moved further ahead to enjoy the party (more on that later!).

Later that night, we did run into each other. And long story short, he apologised for not texting me as him and his group of friends had met with an accident earlier in the day. I would've believed him but I wasn't that drunk. He later tried to kiss me, and I told him that this is not what I'm looking for and I'm already committed to someone (Am I?)- to which he responded with a big "So what?". Turns out, he had been married for an year, yet considering it was an arranged marriage- he didn't love her and already had one too many flings. He was hoping I'd be understanding and I could partake in his cheating adventures and be his "4th extra marital" affair! Needless to say, I said goodbye and got myself another drink to make sense of the proposal that had just been thrown my way!

And this was just one incident- but another incident happened with a friend too- where a man spent the evening with her and didn't even look at other women and made her believe he was so into her- while later when my friend decided to stalk him online- he turned out to be married and a father of a two year old.

That night I realised, that while there are many fish in the sea- Most of the fish are either married, dead, disinterested or unappealing. And the worst part? There might be 389202 fish in the sea that would willingly want to be caught by you but you would only want this one particular fish- and if that fish wants you too.. you're the luckiest person on the face of this earth.

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